I'm going down to South Park Gonna have myself a time
Friendly faces everywhere Humble folks without temptation
Going down to South Park Gonna leave my woes behind
Ample parking day or night People spouting, "Howdy, neighbour"
Heading on up to South Park Gonna see if I can't unwind
Come on down to South Park And meet some friends of mine
Hello, family.
Who wants champagne?
- Randy, what is all this? - It's finally happened, Sharon. I did it.
Here you are, my lady. A brand new leather coat pour vous.
Oh, Randy, it's beautiful!
And some gifts for the kids, too. After all, we're rich now.
- We're rich? - Finally.
Randy, are you being serious?
I just wanted to wait until the deal was all finished.
We are going into business for ourselves!
You are all looking at the new owner of Blockbuster Video.
Blockbuster Video?
Last week, I saw it was up for sale! On a fluke I asked how much.
$10,000! Can you believe it?
We have the entire business.
And we can watch movies whenever we want!
Come on, you guys wanna see it?
You're gonna love it, Sharon. It is in pristine condition.
I just wish you'd have talked to me before spending all our money.
Sharon, it was $10,000 for the entire place. It wasn't gonna last!
Don't worry, we'll make the money back in a week. Guaranteed.
You excited, Stan?
Sorry, I'm watching a movie on my iPad.
Well, there she is.
It's a new beginning for us!
- I don't wanna go in there. - Shelly, come on!
Can you believe it? Completely turn-key.
You got your sci-fi, comedies, buddy flicks, chick flicks,
all on BluRay or DVD.
- Well, what do you think? - It's awesome.
You should try to get it on that Ancient Civilizations show.
So that people can see how cultures used to live.
I get it.
Blockbuster is so out of date. It's ancient.
- Sharon, okay, I get it. - I didn't say anything.
You were thinking it. But you're wrong.
The average person still wants to rent movies they can hold in their hands.
We're gonna have customers up our ass, Sharon.
Up our ass.
How many copies of Meet the Fockers do we have in stock, Shelly?
Six. We still have six.
Okay, good. That should be good, Shelly.
- Go get it, Filmore! - No way.
I ain't going near that place. You go get it.
Hey, you kids looking to rent some DVDs?
What's he talking about, "Renting a Diva Dee?"
I get it. Blockbuster is so old it's creepy.
Nobody rents movies any more.
People just don't know we're open yet!
Little fuckin' pricks.
Hello! Welcome to Blockbuster!
Can I help you find something?
I can't find Turner and Hooch.
Where is Turner and Hooch?
I believe we have that over in...
I get it.
Video stores are so old they have ghosts in them. Okay, thanks, I get it.
- But you're wrong! - Emily.
Emily, the war is over! Let's go rent a movie at Blockbuster.
You can be a spooky ghost all you want, it wasn't a stupid idea to buy this place.
The hounds are calling, Emily! Let's rent something now.
I'll have you know that Netflix, Hulu and Crackle
still don't make the money Blockbuster does.
Streaming movies is not for everyone!
The hounds, Emily! The hounds!
Go ahead! All you want, bro. All you want.
This was a great idea, but, no,
everyone just wants to prove that Randy's goin' crazy!
Don't mind Randy, he's just losing his mind!
You know what? Fuck you and Emily.
I think something might be wrong with Dad.
Ya think?
Hey, Eric and Kenny! You guys don't have costumes?
We're actually on our way over to Kyle's because our costumes
are so multifaceted and cool we have to put them on together.
What are you supposed to be, Butters?
I'm a wereprechaun.
You know, a leprechaun that's been bitten by a werewolf.
- And Jimmy's Gangnam Style. - Gangnam Style.
Yeah, really cool, guys.
You'll be some stiff competition at the costume contest, for sure.
Come on! What are you guys going as?
You'll just have to wait and see.
I think that's good. Feel tight enough?
- Yeah, it's awesome! Thanks, Mom. - Let's see the shield.
Put down the blue orby thing, Red Skull.
Hey, what are you doing?
- Stan's about to go out with his friends. - No, no, I need everybody tonight!
- It's our big night! - For what?
It's Halloween! Everyone rents scary movies on Halloween!
I'm sorry, Stanley, but I need your help here.
- God, I hate this family. - Randy, let him go trick or treating.
You guys don't understand! We're doing a big Halloween promotion.
I've put up flyers, and I've got apple bobbing and candy corns!
This is the night we turn it all around!
- Dad, nobody's gonna come. - You'll see.
I'm sorry, Stan, but in about 30 minutes,
this place is gonna be swamped with people trying to rent DVDs.
Renting DVDs is more ancient than Madonna's boobs.
That's enough, Stanley. Gross.
I can't go trick or treating. My dad says I have to stay and help with the store.
Yes, I'm serious. I know it sucks, Kyle.
Dude, you can't do this! How can we be The Avengers without Captain America?
- I know, but there's nothing I can do. - But what about the costume contest?
- What's going on, Kyle? - Stan can't come.
Stan can't come? But he's fucking Captain America.
I'm sorry, you guys. My dad's doing a big Halloween promotion.
Does anybody even go to Blockbuster any more?
No, dude. Nobody. My dad... He's kind of losing it.
To be honest, I feel kind of bad for him.
Stan, get off the damn phone.
People are gonna start calling to reserve movies!
Oh, never mind, I hate him again.
Dude, you can't miss Halloween. You have your iPad?
- Yeah. - Okay, I'm gonna go grab mine.
I have an idea.
All right, where should we trick or treat first?
How about we try the Barkers? Oh, no, looks like they're not home.
This is fucking ridiculous.
We've been planning this Halloween for two months
- And Stan has to go and ruin it. - He looks fine.
- Let's go to the Petersons' house! - Yeah, he looks totally fine.
Except that when we walk up to a house people are gonna be like,
"Wow, it's The Avengers! And some Captain FaceTime Skateboard Guy!"
- Trick or treat. - Trick or treat.
Look, honey. It's Iron Man, Captain America, Thor and Bruce Vilanch!
- I'm not Bruce Vilanch! - What are you supposed to be?
- Right, you're supposed to be that... - The Incredible...
Right, right! The Incredible Chaz Bono!
Remember, honey, Dancing with the Stars?
- The fat transexual? - Cute!
No, not Chaz Bono! Do you see my skin? I'm green.
The Incredible Harvey Fierstein?
No, Harvey Fierstein's just gay and fat, honey, he's not green.
The person I'm dressed as is not fat and not gay.
The Incredibly Fat and Gay skinny, straight man?
Just give us some fucking candy.
It's Stan's stupid Captain America costume!
That's what's throwing everybody off!
How are people supposed to get that I'm the Hulk
when Captain America is on frickin' FaceTime?
- Trick or treat. - Wow. It's The Avengers.
- That's right. - And Honey Boo Boo!
Kids, come see the green Honey Boo Boo costume!
Oh, it's getting colder out.
Yeah, you can definitely tell that winter's coming.
What's the matter?
That old creepy place. I saw someone in the window there.
Come on, let's get out of here.
They'll come. Sooner or later, they'll have to come!
Why isn't anyone showing up?
It's Halloween night. People should be renting spooky movies!
What's happened to the world? Things used to be so simple.
Good evening, fine sir!
I would like to rent a movie!
Of course, Mr. Marsh. What'll it be?
I'll take a DVD of RoboCop 2 and the director's cut of Blade Runner.
Coming right up.
No place like the video store, eh, my friend?
Convenience at its peak!
Your son and wife don't seem to quite agree with you about the video store.
In fact, your son seems to think video stores are
"as ancient as Madonna's boobs."
He's a very progressive little boy.
Gets it from his mother.
If I may say so, Mr. Marsh.
Your Blockbuster will never get any customers
with those two negative nancies sabotaging you.
You may need to do something rather extreme.
If I may say so, Mr. Marsh.
Trick or treat.
You are the owner of Blockbuster, Mr. Marsh.
You must be willing to do anything.
No. No, I won't do it.
Leave him out of this. He's just a little boy.
Hey, Stan.
We still have an hour before the costume contest,
- So let's go hit the houses on... - Dude. Check it out!
What? What's he doing?
Somebody's breaking into that Kum & Go!
- You guys, we gotta stop him! - Yeah, dude! We are The Avengers!
- Hey, where did you guys go? - Oh, sorry, dude.
All right, Avengers! What say we take this scumbag down!
Stan and Kyle, you take the back entrance!
Cartman and I will block him from the side!
Cartman smash!
All right, the camera's out. Hurry up, you two!
What the? You told me these things were full of money.
It's Halloween. I thought everyone would be renting spooky movies!
- For Odin. For Asgard. - Who are you?
Crap, there's a bunch of them. Never mind.
Holy shit. They shot this guy.
- Oh, my God! - Dude, fuck this, let's bail!
Get them.
Oh, my gosh. That's so cute!
And so what is little Monica wearing? Oh, I bet she's adorable.
No, we've just sort of been here for the most part.
Yeah, are you guys staying in?
You're watching The Thing. Oh, that's fun, on Netflix or Hulu?
On your Xbox.
Yeah, no, at some point I'm hoping we can just call it a night and go home.
No, you don't need to send help. Thanks, though.
Are you guys getting a lot of trick or treaters?
Yeah? Oh, really?
Who, Barb and Michael? Oh, yeah.
Hang on a second, Karen. Can I help you with something?
According to industry experts, many rural areas don't have
the bandwidth to support DVD quality video in streaming services
and won't for years to come,
making DVD rental still their best movie-watching option.
Sorry, Karen. You were saying?
No, it wasn't a customer. No, it's just Randy.
Yes, a customer would have been nice, I know.
God damn it, those kids saw us!
- And you let them get away! - It was The Avengers, Brad!
Hey! We caught one of 'em, we got him tied up in the back.
All right, who were your friends?
Just let me go! We're nobody! We didn't see anything! I promise!
- He's lying. They saw everything! - Let's try this again.
No! Dude, please! This is my best friend's iPad!
No! Okay, okay, okay, okay!
Their names are Bruce, Tony and Kurt!
Hey, one of them dropped this.
It's an invitation to a Monster Mash at the community centre.
- No, no, we weren't gonna go there! - Sure you weren't.
- Get rid of him. - No. I won't say anything, I promise!
What are you gonna do? Please. Please, just let me go.
No!
- Sorry, kid, end of the line. - No!
What the hell?
- Shelly, I need to use your cell phone. - I can't find it. Somebody took it!
All right, Randy. Where are the car keys?
Randy. Where are the keys to the car?
God damn it.
Did you have fun at the Halloween party?
I did. Thanks so much, Ben.
And thanks for walking me home.
- What's the matter? - What is that?
What is what?
Somebody dumped a... Oh, my God, Ben. It's a little boy!
Hello? Are you okay? Little boy?
- Hello? Who is that? - It's okay, try and stay calm.
- Oh, thank God you found me! - What is he doing way out here?
You have to get me to my friends! They aren't safe!
And then we ran out of the Kum & Go and these guys, they took our friend!
Sounds like you're talking about the Redbox killers.
They've murdered over a dozen people trying to get the cash from Redboxes.
Oh, my God. You mean they don't know people can
stream movies cheaper and more conveniently online?
Apparently not. These are dangerous guys.
Do you have any idea where they were headed?
Sir, there's a kid over at the hospital saying he saw everything.
They said they were heading to the big party at the community centre.
You have to stop it. My friends are in trouble!
- Stan. - Guys, you're okay!
- What happened to you? - It's all right, it's just a scratch.
Hey, this means we can still make the costume contest, you guys!
No. They're looking for you there!
Sir, you've got to cancel the Monster Mash.
What? Are you crazy!
We can't cancel the Monster Mash. It's Halloween night!
It's the Monster Mash's biggest night of the year.
The Monster Mash is only on Halloween.
Dude, if these guys are as bad as you say,
then we have to do something!
Yeah. People are going to get hurt.
How many people at the Monster Mash?
Most of the town, sir. It's a graveyard smash.
Look, whatever we do, we better hurry, it gets on in a flash.
You boys say you can identify the Redbox thieves?
- Yes. We saw their faces. - All right then.
We're going to have to send one of you into the party in disguise.
That sure is a great Gangnam Style costume, Craig!
I'm a wereprechaun.
You know, a leprechaun that's been bitten by a werewolf.
Oh, wow, nice costume, Stan. It's GangnamStein!
Don't say my name, Butters! I'm here undercover.
Okay, Stan! Enjoy the Monster Mash!
- Hey, be careful in there! - Sorry! I can't see a thing in here!
It's all right. Just go straight. Now, turn left.
Okay, now, go about ten steps.
Wow, GangnamStein! I wish I'd thought of that!
Stan? Daddy wants to have a little talk, Stan!
Stanny boy! I'm coming!
Look! Wedding Crashers!
- What are you doing, Shelly? - Nothing, Dad.
- Go back to killing the family. - Okay.
Stan! Stanny boy. I'm coming.
M'kay, everyone. It's time to start the costume contest, m'kay.
- Wait a minute, there they are! - There's who?
Listen, everybody, those guys right over there are...
Who are you people? You aren't real!
Hey, hey, I can't see! Where do I go?
You think I'm crazy for buying Blockbuster?
I'll make you pay.
I got a little something for all of you.
Run. You better run.
Look at you people watching movies on your Xbox.
Streaming Halloween 4.
Fire.
- Hey, what are you doing? - It's mine, Dad! Get your own!
What the hell is going on?
We got the son of a bitch.
Wait. Wasn't that Peterson in there?
Well, I hope you guys have learned that crime doesn't pay.
Not with the convenience of online streaming, it don't.
Kyle, Kyle, it's Stan, he's dying.
- Stan? - Hey, dude.
The judging's almost done. You're gonna make it.
Oh, God.
Somebody get me a charger! Hold on, Stan, don't die on us.
It's okay, Kyle, it's okay. Hit okay.
You guys go win that costume contest. You can do it.
- Lift the trophy for me. - You're gonna see it.
Will somebody get me a goddamn charger?
Just have a good Halloween, you guys. And Kenny?
- Yeah, Stan? - Stay gold.
Stan! I'm coming!
I'm coming, Stan!
I spoke with the insurance company.
They said we can get some of our money back.
Not all of it, but some.
You wanna come home? Get changed, take a shower?
No.
You wanna just sit here a little more and be frozen?
Yeah.
You want me to bring you some McDonalds?
Okay.
What do you want from McDonalds?
Chicken nuggets.
And fries.
Sweet and sour sauce.
Hi-C Orange.